She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
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