Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize