U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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