I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
