week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Randomize
