I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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