Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
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