Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I just gift wrapped bread.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
