I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Randomize