do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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