its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
