Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
