its not stalking. its research.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
