Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
