I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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