Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
