just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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