my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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