As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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