Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I think I just sharted jello shots
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