I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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