He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
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