Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize