am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
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If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
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I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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