return my video game
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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