filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Sober January is a disaster.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
