why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
