I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
