She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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