He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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