i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
