i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
