Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
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