never play flip cup with pint glasses
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
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