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apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
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