White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Randomize
