Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize