babies were throwing up all over the place
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Randomize