WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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