I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
