new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I just want to make out with him forever
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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