we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
The best revenge is premature balding
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
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