belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
