is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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