I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Dicks are not precious.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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