Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
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