But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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