Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
