you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize