I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
